Twenty-two

It (emphasis on 'it') has been a hell of a lot of adulting since the last time I wrote anything. hii hey! 

Yeah, we got a puppy! again!

Just like the last time, it was Romi and I who found him playing on the street and couldn't resist but asked the owner nearby "leke jaaye kya?". Four of us tried really hard to come up with a name that we all like and more importantly, a name that fits him. Spoiler alert: we couldn't. And it was actually good that we didn't associate him with any name as he had to leave and go back to his mumma. 

I registered myself for an internship like a big girl.

Cleared up my space, packed my bags and left a disrespectful relationship.

I saw desperation to keep fighting for one's dream and then I heard the slam of all the doors shutting. I've seen dreams crashing and feeling like you've been dropped in the middle of an ocean. and now you're supposed to find your way out?

I saw the person flapping their limbs haphazardly trying to keep their head above the water. Trying to wrap their mind around it, deal with it and when nothing works settling and holding on to a small piece of log in the whole wide ocean.

They say you die two deaths. One is when you helplessly see your dreams shattering in front of your eyes and the other when your heart stops. 

I don't know what it might feel like. I assume it's like being pulled down by a force greater than yourself, drowning, the coldness causes severe hypothermia, unable to move you just... reach where the organisms have never seen sunlight. Pitch black. The high pressure causes your lungs to collapse. Are you still breathing? Can you hear me? 

I am travelling back home tonight, after 67 days.

We got a notification. Turns out, there IS a light at the end of a tunnel (or at the bottom of an ocean, for the sake of metaphor). 

He was the happiest.

I was filling out the form the other day, sipping coke, "Name: Ritika Gupta"

"Course: *regretfully* Third year MBBS

"Age: ......? twenty-? three? two? *goes blank for a second* okay okay fine i remember the cake! 22 it is."